on hold

so i've just had an idea slash realisation. (note the use of the full word slash, as opposed to the symbol. also note the dramatic decrease in efficiency with the explanatory brackets)

i had a phase last year where everything was short-sighted.

and i'd be annoyed because it's not very future-focused and generally an immature kind of way to go about things.

so then the goal was future-focus.

but then with future-focus, i kept delaying things, or putting them on hold because of pressing matters (that happen to have future-repercussions).

as an example.

i have a future-plan for medicine, i wanna do well.

so i organise, i prioritise and i get things prepared so i can actually do work,

and i do do the work, but occasionally i have to juggle between things like church, work, birthdays, general life and in this instance, two exams.

i've got my plans sorted out, i know where i wanna be with both, but i tend to keep wanting to flick between them.

like i'll be doing a few fcp lectures, and then i'll feel like i should finish off my tutorial summaries for ns. and then i realise how big the "finishing" actually is, and procrastinate while i decide, which usually takes 15-30 minutes.

so goal: open my eyes to how much there is to do, and always have something to do. (even if that something is relaxation) otherwise i'll sink into the hole of distracting myself again.

there's so much creative writing, bible study, training, conversation that i could have instead of... bejeweled (no matter how good it is)

awkwardly yours,

http://www.facebook.com/peterbvn